you're fat. i totally respect that. i fully support the whole "refusing-to-conform-to-society's-demands" thing, and i think most of what doctors tell us is hogwash. working out sucks, dieting sucks more, big is beautiful, and cheese is delicious. for the most part, i'm on your side.
for the most part.
because, you see, dear fatties, i do have one very serious bone to pick with you (get it? because
they love to eat). if and when you find yourself needing to walk down the sidewalk in manhattan - although i understand that you must necessarily move slowly, and i also understand that such an undertaking is eased by the presence of one of your similarly tubby friends - it is NOT necessary that the two (or three! or more!) of you walk side by side. it's just not. these sidewalks are narrow, and there are 8 million more new yorkers (many of us faster-moving) who would like to get by. and, while i suspect you would not be ok with me grabbing the rolls around your midsection and hollering, "outta the way, tons o'fun!", i am not above doing so if that's what it takes to get me home and to my knitting-and-a-glass-of-wine raucous evening plans a little faster.so, please, for your sakes and mine, let's try single file.
love and jiggles,
julie
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